Friday, September 24, 2010

Life, Daughters & Furniture

In life we all have many experiences ~ good, bad, happy, sad and of course, painful.  I recently had some issues with my daughter ~ this has not been the first time.  My problems with her go way back ~ she had been on drugs since the age of 13 ~ she then had her first child at age 20.  Of course, she could not take care of this baby, so I took the baby at 1 yr.old ~ my daughter would be gone for months and months ~ I wouldn't hear from her nor did I know where she was.  But I figured it was her choice ~ I had my granddaughter, Alexis and I knew that Alexis was fine.  Melissa's behavior was out of control all the time ~ drugs, alcohol and who knows what else.  Four years later, she became pregant again, this time I ended up with the baby at the age of 6 weeks ~ again, taking care of her as if she was my own child.  Six months later, my daughter decides she wants to go to Rehab for help.  Fine ~ of course, this is not free ~ so, here I go again.  Paying money, making sure she had all her toiletries and whatever she needed while she was in there.  In the meantime, I still have both of my granddaughters to take care of and working full time.  I actually owned and ran a small boutique selling clothing, jewelery, accessories and home decor.  My business was going very well but then it got to be too much for me to handle having two small children to take care of.  I ended up selling my business, which made me very sad.  She wrecked three of my vehicles through the years and has made me spend thousands and thousands of dollars on so many things in life.

Through the years, I have struggled with my daughter's addictions and trying to guide her and help her.  My granddaughters are now 8 and 12 and have lived with me all these years until recently.  Alexis and Samantha moved in with their mother, when she got her own apartment (previous blog on this also).  Although she now had her own apartment, she continued to need my assistance, financially and also with my car.  I would have to take her back and forth to work ~ I would take my granddaughters to school, to the dentist, etc. ~ all the things that parents are supposed to do, I have done.

Our latest incident all started because I wanted to take my granddaughters to CCE class ~ I was brought up as a catholic and have always felt that our faith is very important to us.  Teaching children about the bible and about our God is also very important.  Since things did not go the way my daughter wanted, she got very angry and upset.  I also exploded as I felt so tired of always playing the role of a parent, as opposed to a grandparent.  Things got way out of control and the rest is facebook history.
I had no idea that Melissa was posting all the nasty things she posted ~ I was away from my computer and did not know.  When I arrived home, my son called and said to me, "mom, I don't know what's going on, but you better get on your facebook page now".  I couldn't believe what she was doing ~ she knew how important my business is to me and she went right to it.  This is a picture of my son, Freddy, and my granddaughter, Alexis.  He is the best son any mom could have.

Well, I felt as if my business was down the drain at this point ~ who in the world would want to do business with someone who has these kind of issues going on?  But guess what?  I found out that I have the most wonderful fans/friends out there.  The outpour of support, encouragement and love I received was unbelievable.  I know now that life will go on and my business will continue as usual.  My daughter, who is now 32 yrs. old, must now learn how to take care of herself and her children.  I no longer want this responsibility and I refuse to feel guilty about it.  I feel as I've done more than I really needed to, as a grandparent. This is my other granddaughter, Samantha, now 8 (in the middle)

Thank you to all my facebook friends/fans for your words of encouragement.  I couldn't have made it without you. I love you guys and hope to meet each and everyone of you one day.

May God Bless you and thanks for stopping. by

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